Spreading holiday cheer with Shop with a Hero

By Andrea Bruner, White River Now

The kids accompanied by community “heroes” may have looking for the latest Barbie doll and Lego set, but for Independence County Sheriff Shawn Stephens – “Shop with Hero” means a lot more, such as building trust and positive interactions between law enforcement and children in the foster system.

For more than a decade, the Area IX Foster Parent Association has been working with law enforcement, firefighters, Arkansas Game & Fish, and Vital Link to ensure that foster children in Independence County have a merry Christmas. On Tuesday, Dec. 2, the annual Shop with a Hero was held, pairing a community “hero” with a child in foster care as they are given money to shop.

Ashley Trivitt, who serves as president of the local association, said the shopping event started more than a decade ago and was originally known as “Shop with a Cop,” named after similar events across the country, but in Independence County, there were so many firefighters, first responders and others who answered the call to help that they renamed it “Shop with a Hero.”

Trivitt said in the early years, they ran on private donations and foster children got around $50-75 to shop, but then Lisa Lillard organized a fundraiser after the death of her son, Zachary Lillard, in 2015. In Zach’s memory, Lillard and her team created Mingle and Jingle, with all proceeds going to the foster parent association.

“Mingle and Jingle was a huge Christmas benefit at the community center, and they held that until Covid hit, but it gave us a cushion to keep going,” Trivitt said, adding that in the early years there were as many as 225 foster children shopping. “We had a lot of funding, so we opened it up to Jackson, Sharp, White and Stone counties.”

However, she said the Division of Children and Family Services in recent years has launched new services that focus on family preservation with enhanced supervised visitation and other services to keep children safe but still residing within their families. This means the number of foster children has decreased, Trivitt said, so the local association has about 65-80 kids each year shopping with heroes.

While the number of foster kids has dropped – unfortunately, so has the number of donations. Trivitt said there were some years where the shoppers had $250 each, followed by years that were in the $175-200 range, and this year it was $150.

Trivitt said she sends letters to potential donors, and each year there are businesses and private citizens that donate to the cause. Walmart also donated $1,500 this year, she said.

Stephens said it saddens him to see the number of kids who have been told to fear police, and that’s why events like this are so important. “I don’t want them to be afraid of us,” he said, explaining that the kids may be in a situation one day where they need police, and he wants them to be able to make that call without fear that they are “going to jail” as some have been told.

“Every dollar comes from the community,” she went on to say. “There are some people in town who know our ‘heroes’ and donate directly to them.”

Trivitt and Brandy Webb, who serves as vice president of the association, said they cannot thank the heroes enough for volunteering their time to come out.

“They all show up and they all love it,” Trivitt said. “They get to see the joy on all those kids’ faces, but they also get to see the change in the child. … A lot of children were taught; ‘You don’t talk to police officers, you lie to police officers, and you hate anybody in authority.’ Not all of them, but a good majority.”

“Or they’ve seen police come in and arrest their mom and dad, or help take them away from their parents,” Webb added.

“So a big part of this event is showing them in another light, that they are the good people and they can be their friends,” Trivitt said. “Every year we have a few children that are scared to death and they don’t want to go, but then later I get a message from their (foster) parent who said they had the biggest smile on their face when they were leaving Walmart and they wanted to hug the person (hero).”

Stephens said it saddens him to see the number of kids who have been told to fear police, and that’s why events like this are so important. “I don’t want them to be afraid of us,” he said, explaining that the kids may be in a situation one day where they need police, and he wants them to be able to make that call without fear that they are “going to jail” as some have been told.

Webb said there have been foster children who had PTSD from things that have happened with law enforcement, and they come in scared, so organizers try to find a hero the kids will be comfortable and relaxed with.

Batesville Fire Chief Mark McCollum said he and his department have been part of the shopping event since the beginning.

“I think it’s really overwhelming for the kids because they’re not used to having much of anything so they don’t know what to do. You’ll get a kid that wants clothes – they won’t even think about toys.”

This year McCollum shopped with a 12-year-old girl, who wanted to buy for her brother, too.

“She was more worried about everybody else around her,” McCollum said. “She bought books, hair stuff and makeup – nothing really frivolous. She did get a craft kid that makes bracelets out of rubber bands. It’s a very humbling experience seeing these kids do this.”

Batesville Firefighter Michael Owens said he had a boy about 15 years old as well as a younger boy, about 4 or 5 years old.

“The older boy was really happy to be there; he went around and got cards and records, stuff like that. The younger boy started out going to get some (spinning) tops and Beyblades stuff, but as we went on he started changing his mind. For someone who was 5 years old he had a good sense of things. He went from plastic stuff to getting a large plush, and he seemed to have a really good time with it.”

Stephens said it’s a blessing to be part of the event, and that his department has no shortage of volunteers.

“When we find out the date, we send out an email, and we always have people ready and willing,” Stephens said. “The night shift comes in before they clock in, and then the day shift will catch the tail end of it.”

Stephens joked that that the young girl he shopped with was done within minutes, having never moved more than five feet away from the Barbie aisle.

“This is my 10th year to do it, and it’s a great event,” he said. “It’s heartwarming to see the smiles these kids have.”

He said Walmart provides dinner for all the foster families, and there is also a Santa Claus who donates his time to take photos and talk to the kids.

“There were 65 children and 45 signed in as ‘heroes’ but I know there was more,” Webb said. “It was supposed to start at 5, and I got there at 4:15 to set up the sign-in table, but we already had several heroes there. The youth ranch had 20 kids when I got there, and another family had brought 8 kids, so we never got the table set up

“Our heroes have learned our kids show up early.”

Webb, who fostered 22 kids herself and has adopted, said she has seen firsthand that when kids come into foster care, they often arrive with little so things are given to them – and that’s a lot different than being able to pick out their own clothes and other belongings.

“They’re just handed things and put in a bedroom that wasn’t their bedroom, so this is something they’re able to choose on their own,” she said.

At Shop with a Hero, kids are allowed to pick out pretty much anything within reason – that does not include swing sets and trampolines because those are not mobile when the kids move or go back home. If they want a cellphone, they check with the foster family to see whether those are allowed. They can pick out snacks, shoes, clothes as well as toys, and many want to buy for a sibling or parent, especially since most have never gotten to do that before, so that makes it even more exciting for the kids, Webb said.

Besides the Batesville Fire Department and Independence County Sheriff’s Office, there were also “heroes” this year from the Game and Fish offices from Cleburne and Jackson counties, Newport Police Department, Northside, Ruddell Hill and Southside fire departments, and Probation and Parole. In years past, there have also been representatives from Vital Link and the Arkansas State Police.

“Our heroes are so amazing – they know what the kids’ budget is and some let their kids just go over and pull out their own wallet and pay for it,” Webb said.

“And they do that every year, every year,” Trivitt said.

Webb said the officers told her they look forward to this every year, that it’s one of their favorite community outreach events, and they want to help keep it going.

“Ashley’s done really good to get those letters out, but it’s really hard to get funding with the economy – you see donations going down every year,” Webb said.

The foster parent association also provides Easter baskets each year, hosts a back-to-school swim party, and helps out with school supplies, eyeglasses, clothing and other needs.

“When the tornado went through Cave City, I was immediately there with gift cards and water. We help the families throughout the year,” Trivitt said, noting that Independence County may have 75-85 children in the foster system.

The association also invites and serves Independence County foster children living in different counties, as well as children from different counties currently residing in this county. “We serve them all at any of our events. … We want to reach as many people as we can for any event we do.”

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For more information about the foster parent association or making donations, contact Ashley Trivitt at 870-805-9664 or email ashley_trivitt@icloud.com.

Donations may also be mailed to Area IX Foster Parent Association, 2517 Harrison St., Box 147, Batesville, AR 72501.

Trivitt and Webb said they have several volunteers whom they count on to help with the event, like Mary Hammer, who has been a foster parent for years, as well as Sonya Gaither, Mandie Hall and Amanda Nikkel. Webb said they are not members of the association but they come to help and Shop with a Hero “would not have been as successful without them.”

They also appreciate all of those who donate time and money to the cause. “We want to thank our community because we can’t do this without them,” Trivitt added. “They keep us going.”

Featured image provided by Mel Stephens